The first time I did something “wrong” at the bedside of a client who was dying, I beat myself up about it for days! I’d burst into tears while talking with a family member and I was so mad at myself because I’d wanted to be this “perfect” doula and professional. Turns out they were so happy that I’d been real with them. They appreciated my authenticity and my vulnerability.

Being with dying has taught me so much about perfectionism. Do things “right” and I’m gonna die. Do things “wrong” and I’m still gonna die! Only a very few of these right and wrong decisions have an actual impact on our mortality. And remembering that I’m going to die puts these seemingly huge mess-ups in perspective.

I still struggle with it and this week has been particularly tough. Yet, when I can look outside of myself and the moment of that thing that wasnt done juuuuust right, I realize that I probably wont be thinking about it on my deathbed. That’s some serious perspective.

As always, thank you for giving me a minute of your life to think about the end of it. ⏳🙏🏿💜

For death doula training, visit www.goingwithgrace.com/trainingdetails

For death doula services, visit www.goingwithgrace.com/services