I have a request to make of you and I’m going to ask nicely even though I don’t feel nicely about it.

Please stop minimizing the deaths of our elders. ✨👵🏿👴🏾

Ageism is rampant in death care and in grief. This is what it sounds like in grief in particular… At least she lived a long, full life. AND you got to spend 95 good years with her, and your grandma lived to see ALLLLL of this. Whereas, when a young person dies we say their lives were cut tragically short, and she had her whole life ahead of her and it’s out of the natural order of things.

Here is something that’s not really popular – death is a part of the natural order of things no matter how old somebody is. I know it’s not nice, but it’s true. When we say things like she lived a long full life, we end up minimizing the experience of grief for the person who is grieving somebody who died, because it makes it sound like they can’t be sad because the person was old. So stop doing that shit okay!?

Thank you for giving me a minute of your life to think about the end of it. 💜🙏🏿⏳

For Death Doula Training information go HERE